your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Randomize
