so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
