I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize
