if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
