Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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