The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize