I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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