is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
