All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
it glows. i had to have it.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize