oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize