Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
