Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
