is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm really busy with my period
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