If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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