Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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