I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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