Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
porn star boner night. come get it.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
