they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
