i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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