Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
