Me. At least after what I've been through.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
