She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Randomize