That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Randomize
