all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
