yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
