I wish I only lived at night.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
