shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize