so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
