You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize