you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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