Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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