his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
