My hair reeks of homosexuality.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
