Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Randomize
