That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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