It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
