that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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