mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
