she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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