Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
