i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
