STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
