I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize