I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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