The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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