And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Randomize
