hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
lets start a swedish sibling band together
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Sorry about my life...
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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