We should be called the Road Head Warriors
im six kinds of drunk right now
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
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