unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
