I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize